Not quite Kryptonite

[alwaysmyturn]

1. [The next time anyone encounters this particular goddess, she's in the pantry thinking hard about something. There's also a particularly good example of solanum melongena here, resting atop a counter about 10 meters away from her.]

Okay, so I didn't think it'd be that bad when there were just a few of 'em around...and it's not like I haven't fought an army of 'em before, but...

...I need help to find a better way to deal with eggplants!

---


2. [Some time after 1, you'll find a transformed Neptune in the same space, only curled up in a corner instead.]

Even in this form, it's useless...

[The other Gamindustri goddesses are just watching with expressions ranging from amused to downright disappointed.

That eggplant on the counter? Still there. You can almost make out a smile on its face if it actually had one.]

Comments

2

[the_innocent_blade]

Nep...

This is just embarrassing...

[purple_energy]

This is a matter of life and death, Crow.

You should have seen how close I got to it before...

[She almost gags right there.]

[the_innocent_blade]

It's just...an eggplant.

[purple_energy]

It's an abomination that should not exist - one that will devour your very soul!

And it happens to be my one true weakness...

1

[saikyocivrobo]

You know, eggplant is quite delicious when fried.

[alwaysmyturn]

That's the same thing they say about bugs!

[saikyocivrobo]

I never actually tried eating bugs. Now you've made me curious...

[alwaysmyturn]

Are you even human?!

2

[fermionprincess]

Surely, the situation cannot be so serious!

[Watch out trollface eggplant, a woman of SCIENCE approaches you rapidly.]

[alwaysmyturn]

Don't approach it so carelessly!

[fermionprincess]

Do not worry, I shall demonstrate a Champion's ingenuity in dealing with such vegetables!

[Alessandra bravely stands by the eggplant and cuts into it with a knife.]

1

[paladin_robot]

And your plan is to... what? Stare at it from the other side of the room?

[Richard is unimpressed, if understanding.]

[alwaysmyturn]

Welll...that's where I need help.

I'm pretty stumped here.

[paladin_robot]

Well, I could probably turn it into something else via alchemy... but that probably wouldn't work on a regular basis. What else...

Consider it your part of your purple brethren?

1

[rolla_up]

If it helps I don't think we'll be fighting any other Eggplant based enemies.
...Or not as a serious threat anyways.

2

[gurrenbrigbonded]

Matthew eyes that eggplant with a worried frown, remembering all too well the time that the Gurren was transformed into a heaven-piercing, sunglasses wearing vegetable.

He rummages through the kitchen for a moment...and then pulls out several items which he sets on the counter with the graveness of a safe-cracker laying out his tools.

Breading. Parsley. Olive Oil. And Three Eggs.

[purple_energy]

[Neptune observes this for a bit.]

If you're thinking of consuming it, please reconsider...

[gurrenbrigbonded]

"Shhhh!" Matthew hisses. "Consume or not, this recipe should defuses the Eggplant's raw potency and render it into a more...palatable form, if I can get the batter right, quiaff?"

He cracks the eggs into a bowl, gets some flour from a cupboard, pours that into a bowl, and then the bread-crumbs into a third, leaving him with three bowls as well. He pulls out a knife.

"If you wish to help, get some marinara sauce. Decide whether or not you wish to keep cowering in a corner!"

1

[hammerinhero]

You know, I have the same issues with Bell Peppers and Mushrooms?

[alwaysmyturn]

And I thought I had it bad...

[hammerinhero]

Fear not, though. To this hero, Eggplants are no problem! Allow me to deliver my mighty Hammer of Justice to the fiend!

[Yuu points dramatically at the tyrant vegetable.]

In darkest night, I have arrived to end your wrath, eggplant! With skills passed on by my forefathers and the strength of justice, I cannot fail!

[He pauses, as if waiting for something...]

2

[can_not_fly]

...uh, Nep? Are you okay?

[Pit happens through the kitchen with the intention of making himself a sandwich, and notices the huddling Neptune there]

[purple_energy]

Ah, Pit.

[She shakes her head.]

Nothing is wrong...except that plant on the counter over there.

[And she points at the eggplant.]

1/2

[can_not_fly]

Uh, plant? What pla-

[Pit turns towards the counter, all sorts of weirded out...]

2/2

[can_not_fly]

[... and suddenly, the very instant his eyes roll over the eggplant, like a bolt of lightning he's in a guard stance with his weapon out and pointing at the vegetable. He narrows his eyes]

Eggplant.