Ein Verrückter Rückkehr

[inneedofasmoke]

1) [Hangar]

[Everyone. There's a DC transport making a delivery. And you'll never guess who just came back.]

Meine Freunde. Its good to see you all again!

[Its Luger. But wait... there's... something VERY different about him. He's.... clean? And well dressed! It looks like someone spent years trying to hammer in some decency into him and it WORKED!]

[His Leo is offloaded the transport looking the same as ever. So at least some things haven't changed... BUT WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS UTTER INSANITY BEFORE YOU!?]

2) [EveRYwhEre] (Mingle)

[Its the middle of the night. Maybe you're working in the hangars. Maybe you're getting some rest in your quarters. Maybe you're getting a late night snack.]

-chirp... chirpchirpchirp-

[Then you hear it. The sound of a rodent. A gerbil to be precise. Its sitting not too far away. It seems to have been painted... oddly it faintly resembles one of the machines in the hangar... and there's a doll on its back that resembles the pilot of the aforementioned machine the gerbil resembles.]

-chirpchirpchirpchirp--chirp... chirpchirpchirp--chirp chirpchirpchirp-

[Then you spot a few more Gerbils. And then several more.... and MORE.]

[Throughout the Chalice, the story is the same. Massive amounts of painted gerbils with likenesses of various Chalice personel strapped to their backs.]

[Somewhere within the Chalice, amongst the mass chirping and squeaking - there's a wall with something painted on it.]

[The wording is sloppy and ill painted. But anyone with knowledge of german could translate it.]

-I'M BACK BITCHES!-

Comments

[inneedofasmoke]

[He scratches his chin before holding a hand up... what does he do? He pulls over a massive cold box and opens it up! Revealing ANOTHER box that looks to be made of... potato?]

I've been making plans... when my idea involving Dick Pentagon did not go through I decided to use what I learned for something completely different!

[If you look closer at the Potato-box you'll realize its actually got intricate carvings like some kind of sarcophagus - and every single one is ridiculously lewd or utterly insane. And when Luger opens the box, lo and behold! Dick Pentagon Mark 2! Maximus Erectus!]

[azure_savior]

...

I regret asking you to do this in the first place.

[Josh is just STAAAARING now. This'll teach him to doubt seeming strangers' presence onboard the ship.]

[inneedofasmoke]

Oh, but you HAD to be sure mein freund. There's no telling who could have tried to sneak in as me!

So how about I tell you about how I made herr Maximus Erectus here?

[OH GOD! ABORT JOSH! ABORT!!!]

First time I've ever used this icon

[azure_savior]

I'D RATHER YOU DIDN'T! REALLY! REALLY!

I WAS AN IDIOT TO THINK ANYONE WOULD BOTHER TRYING TO IMPERSONATE YOU!

[inneedofasmoke]

You really WOULD like to hear about it? That's VERY good to know!

[Not even remotely what Josh said, but clearly Luger's having a problem called SELECTIVE DEAFNESS.]

You see I started with-

[RUN! RUN FOR GOD'S SAKE JOSH! RUUUUUN!!!]

[azure_savior]

DON'T WANT TO HEAR DON'T WANT TO HEAR DON'T WANT TO HEAR DON'T WANT TO HEAR-

[Yeah, Josh is screaming his guts out as he flees down the hall at full speed.]